bitch

i am sick of bitching. just in general. i bitch, you bitch... why can people not just take up their issue with the person involved, instead of complaining to everyone except those who have strong connotations with that individual?

it hurts, y'know? i'm not a complete moron. and i look across the room and see two people who are supposed to be some of my best friends bitching about me. and i hate that, because i think that whatever i might have done, i don't deserve to see people say horrible things about me, and not know exactly what those horrible things are. take it up with me, okay? because you two know exactly who you are. and if you're not sure, then you're clearly way more insensitive than i thought. maybe my friendships are all a waste. because really, none of them seem to take my feelings into consideration; only their own. i'm not saying i've never forgotten how i'm making people feel. it's just that people seem to forget about me more than most. and they're a waste because ultimately, what every single one ends in is arguing because of bitching.

am i that bad a person that i end every single friendship like that? because it's not always my fault. if girls could just talk to each other about their problems instead of spreading around the school how much they hate each other, we could all get along so much better. and i'm not going to pretend to be perfect; i've bitched more than my fair share. i just don't see why i or anyone else has. we hate feeling like this; when it seems like the world is against us and everyone's siding with someone else (which, incidentally, is true here). so why do it?

it's as bad as being stupid and macho and thinking that a fight will solve your problems.

next time someone does something to upset you, for god's sake just tell them! because you know how crap it is to be bitched about. and don't hold it back, because you'll end up holding a grudge. and that makes you bitter. every time.